chillkröte.

Aunt Flo is Visiting.

2012-02-06T22:12:00.001+01:00

Have you ever thought about your problems? All of them? At once? Alone? Under the blanket?

Sometimes I hate it when I get my period. But normally I don't. I feel thankful that I'm a woman and that someday, I'm able to have children. Sharing your love with someone and having a child isn't something everyone is blessed with.

It gives me terrible mood swings though.

Two days ago, I cried for no reason whatsoever. I called home, felt happy everything was going on well, hung up and tears just started pouring out. Really, it didn't even well up in my eyes. It just poured and poured, stopped after five minutes though.

And I read a few lines that reminded me of what it's like being in love (despite my forever alone relationship status) just made me swell up inside. The physical side of it too! No wait, no sex, just you know, having that particular person in the same room and all you seem to notice is him. The way he sits next to you. Your knees touching his because he's that close and the room is so crowded. Mmm...

Then this terrible feeling of not stepping up. Generally in life. Where you think about all your problems at once. OK, reading this is making me realize how foolish this is. Silly me :)

Then there are the first day cramps. On a day where you have to take an exam just isn't funny. This siberian winter isn't helping with the cramps either. But again, I was lucky despite not taking my pink pills not to cramp in the exam hall. It waited till I was at home again, in my pink pyjamas, under my pink duvet.

But hey, I know how to be happy alone. (God forbid I should stay alone). There's nothing like spending some me time. A playlist of some mellow songs that remind me of people I love, a bunch of grapes and a glass of chocolate milk for dinner. Oh and I'll light up some apple candles later :)

Because I like You Like Teh Tarik! =)

2012-01-16T17:52:00.002+01:00

I tried to do ~~handstands~~ teh tarik for you

I tried to do ~~headstands~~ teh tarik for you

Every time I fell on you yeah every time I fell

I tried to do ~~handstands~~ teh tarik for you

But every time I fell for you

I'm permanently black and blue, permanently blue for you

As The Saying Goes, Don't Judge A Book By It's Cover

2012-01-14T18:56:00.002+01:00

YESTERDAY, as I was hanging out at a friend's house, just drawling about a current admiration for a certain someone, a friend asked me; Is that really what I want?

My mood immediately went southbound. The current admiration is based on my tendencies towards guys who have a balanced sense of fun, good intentions and the ultimate goal of Jannah. Yes, I know what the word means, and beyond doubt, is also my ultimate goal. This particular guy (in my POV) has the exact mixture of what I'm looking for.

What saddens me is that, a lot of my peers seem to think I'm all about fun and flaunting of every worldly possession known to man. Is it wrong that I know exactly how I want to dress or that my choice of grub is a little bit fastidious than some? Does that define me as a worldly person with no thoughts on the Afterlife?

This is the first time in my life genuinely liking someone from the opposite sex. Before this, it was always me letting guys making the first step and me awkwardly responding. In a way letting people come into my life without really consenting. I thought guys should always make the first step. However, everyone who is familiar with the story of our Prophet's PBUH first wife can explicitly make the exact opposite remark.

I don't don a head cover and in a pitiful tone, it is a flaw. The only way I console myself thinking about this sometimes is, that no man on earth is without flaw. But I do not think this inevitably gives everyone the freedom of categorizing me as a Schlampe or a corrupted woman. I am again, just a person with flaws.

A lot of times I laugh off to my own distressing feelings like anger, annoyance or grief. But laughing doesn't make me super human. I dare to say, it's the opposite. Not a lot of people know of my vulnerability and the degree of Einfuehlsamkeit that I can possess.

Now writing this, I do hope the person meiner schlaflose Naechte realizes to an extent what my intentions are. What happens then, is ultimately his predilection and I promise to those who worry about me not to let it get to me in a corrupting way, be it a good or bad response. After all, what's loving without risking something?

Hating Your Father

2012-01-05T00:51:00.002+01:00

It's hard to not hate someone who hurts the person you love the most in the whole wide world. It's harder when he doesn't do his best to care and to provide for your only little brother who still lives at home and depends on your parents.

It hurts me the most to think that my gentle giant of a brother is growing up in an awkward situation where he cannot even look up to his own father. Having a close male role model. I vow to do my best to set a good example.

Being away means I don't have to deal with a deadbeat of a father. We don't talk, we never do. It's not like he cares anyway. It's not that I care. I don't even care that he treats other people's children better and cares about them more than his own. Fuck you. My mom deserves better than this, but maybe that's just what she has to endure in this lifetime.

Sometimes I used to dream of killing him with my bear hands. Barbaric you might say. I guess it's just all this pent up anger. I don't ever care enough to hate him, I just hate it that my little brother is the victim of the situation. But little brother, I am so proud of you, you lazy monster. You didn't study, lost your notes, how the hell did you get straight A's?! I guess you're blessed in a forsaken position. And I'm more than proud of you for that.

I'm sorry, but why do you have to be such an asshole. If you can't handle the situation, just kill yourself, and I don't mean it in a bad way. OK, suicide is an unforgivable sin, but you don't care about sins anyway, don't you?

UK - Family - Food - Fun

2012-01-03T03:42:00.000+01:00

Date: 23rd - 30th December 2011
Place of Departure: Weeze, Germany
Last Place of Departure: Cologne/Bonn International Airport

On the left: Second day of arrival, Makan at Portobello Market. FINALLY! Reached Portobello Market

Above pictures of me during the roadtrip with the family. Padarn castle in the background and a sign stating "Lambing". Them sheep in UK were just chilling on the side of the hill, can't be up on them grill! London - Cardiff - North Wales - Manchester (with stops at small towns on the way). My 76 year old grandfather really amazes me at how much nagging he can tolerate from our step-grandma (his children married him off after the death of Tok).

He got a big ol' deco bowl for my mom (his first daughter) and set his foot down on bringing back presents for my family despite my aunt making a fuss of too much to carry back. Around 200kg baggage allowance.

Finally I asked him about his earlier life. He went to school at the age of 10, graduated at 16 and became a teacher with a salary of RM65 a month. Due to the japanese expanding their military base, they had to move out of his birth town Teluk Air Tawar to Kepala Batas, where I call Kampung. He retired as principal at the age of 56.

After saying goodbye to the family, Manchester was my final destination. Dalam gambar ini ada artis, eh, artis kewwww...

I ate a LOT of rice in UK. Finally experiencing UK with malaysian students, UK is actually Malaysia without your family and without the sun. Oh, and political naggers. Tz.

German men look better than UK men though. I'm sorry! =D

This is A New Year's Post

2012-01-01T22:50:00.001+01:00

Wow, sudah tahun baru dah. Umur pun tahu ni akan meningkat. Semua umur kita la meningkat, lain la Benjamin Button yang terbalik sikit.

I've lost and loved, and learned to look forward again. 2011 has definitely made a new me. Tak, belum kurus lagi, tapi dah lebih matang.

Tahun ini lah, I mula belajar, how important family is. Tahun ini lah, dah umur 23 tahun belajar sendiri (wow 23 dowww, rasa dewasa) how to really love your Mitmenschen.

Happy New Year everyone, God speed.

Ini Entri Pemalas

2011-12-19T16:59:00.003+01:00

The days are getting shorter, the nights are getting longer. I feel like being a social recluse. Building a house on a tree and hunting for food. LOL. And I don't even like camping.

Assignment due tomorrow. I'm nearly finished. But I need to study. Study Study Study.

I wish it wasn't this dark.

Cooking Tips: Cups to Grams

2011-12-10T23:56:00.001+01:00

WHITE SUGAR

U.S. cups	to	Grams

1/8 cup		30 grams
1/4 cup		55 grams
1/3 cup		75 grams
3/8 cup		85 grams
1/2 cup		115 grams
5/8 cup		140 grams
2/3 cup		150 grams
3/4 cup		170 grams
7/8 cup		200 grams
1 cup		225 grams

ALL PURPOSE FLOUR AND CONFECTIONERS' SUGAR

U.S. cups	to	Grams

1/8 cup		15 grams
1/4 cup		30 grams
1/3 cup		40 grams
3/8 cup		45 grams
1/2 cup		60 grams
5/8 cup		70 grams
2/3 cup		75 grams
3/4 cup		85 grams
7/8 cup		100 grams
1 cup		110 grams

BUTTER OR MARGARINE

U.S. cups	to	Grams

1/8 cup		30 grams
1/4 cup		55 grams
1/3 cup		75 grams
3/8 cup		85 grams
1/2 cup		115 grams
5/8 cup		140 grams
2/3 cup		150 grams
3/4 cup		170 grams
7/8 cup		200 grams
1 cup		225 grams

The Best and Easiet Soft Cookie in The World

2011-12-04T12:17:00.001+01:00

Ingredients

2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup unsalted butter, melted
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup white sugar
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 egg
1 egg yolk
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

Directions

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C). Grease cookie sheets or line with parchment paper.
Sift together the flour, baking soda and salt; set aside.
In a medium bowl, cream together the melted butter, brown sugar and white sugar until well blended. Beat in the vanilla, egg, and egg yolk until light and creamy. Mix in the sifted ingredients until just blended. Stir in the chocolate chips by hand using a wooden spoon. Drop cookie dough 1/4 cup at a time onto the prepared cookie sheets. Cookies should be about 3 inches apart.
Bake for 15 to 17 minutes in the preheated oven, or until the edges are lightly toasted. Cool on baking sheets for a few minutes before transferring to wire racks to cool completely.

Recipe ripped of from Allrecipes

Footnote: I have varied the recipe and found out that white sugar adds to the crispiness and brown to its 'oiliness'.

Chapter Six

2011-11-30T22:50:00.001+01:00

Great. Arthur is gay and he has a live in partner. I swear sometimes I feel like hitting my head on a concrete wall. My brown curly haired baby fantasy just crashed and burned in under thirty seconds. Ofcourse he didn't notice girls wearing low cut tops, he notices guys. I have enough gay pals but sometimes I'm just over my head with all my daydreams. Oh well.

Their house was amazing. A mix of rustic and shabby chic. I didn't expect any less. They are two gay men living under one roof. I made sure a wiped my shoes thoroughly before entering because they had wall-to-wall white carpet flooring. I guess they're not planning on adopting babies soon. We went to the living room. It was almost as big as my flat that I shared with two other girls. In the middle of the room was a huge leather sofa. Every inch was meticulously decorated with souvenirs from other countries.

His honey turned out to be Manny. A very charming 30-ish spaniard from Columbia. Manny greeted Polly with a peck on a cheek and gave me a kiss on the hand. If I hadn't known he was gay, my cheeks would've been purple now. There was a big old columbian flag in their living room, next to a well stocked birch bookshelf. After the hearty greet from Manny I started to feel the columbian nationalism myself, speaking neither spanish nor ever having set foot in the country. Yes, I am that impressionable. Manny grabbed my waist and plonked me on a couch next to him. Polly was already leaning on Arthurs' wheelchair sharing some new family gossip.

Manny turned out to be a bit too chattty despite having a really thick spanish accent. He started lecturing me on how english people have strange customs and that they do a lot of things differently back in Columbia. I didn't even get to open my mouth and tell him I'm not english.

Arthur suggested we stay for the night. Polly immediately agreed and started helping herself at the minibar. Manny followed suit and whipped up a cuba libre for himself.
"And what would you like Brenda?" Manny said winking at me.
"It's Betty, just cola please," how is Betty and Brenda close to each other? Manny muttered a quick sorryd and brought me my beverage. He nudged me playingly with side of his body. He smelled like a latin lover on a salsa dancefloor. I'm sure he definitely finishes a bottle of perfume every week.

Apparently already feeling comfortable, Polly went to the kitchen, which was an open kitchen and started pulling out some pots and pans. She announced she would make some fourth of July pancakes. Whatever that meant. I swear sometimes she thinks she's american. But I do love sweet pancakes. With honey and a blob of butter on top. Chocolate syrup on the side wouldn't be so bad either. Mhh, I can feel my mouth watering eventhough we just ate dinner two hours ago.

Then came a really loud alarm from outside. Initially, we thought it was one of the neighbours car. But it didn't seem to stop after two minutes.And then came this really loud knocking from the window. The alarm was still going on, so Manny went to the window. A neighbor was signalling for him to open it. But before he did, we could all see a big fire coming from the backyard of the house on the opposite side of the road. The smoke was pitch black. Polly dropped the pans and ran for Arthur, Manny already darting towards the door and I managed to shriek before running out.

Everyone from the neighborhood was already in the parking lot next to the row of houses. Not as dramatic as a fire in the ghetto. And ok, it wasn't really a big fire, if you could even call it a fire. Everyone seemed to just stand about with their blackberrys and iphones. Probably updating facebook statuses and tweeting about the fire. I'm just glad this isn't as horrific as I imagined it would be. Maybe I should tweet to my friends and family to tell them I'm thankful for having them in my life...

Then Polly came and nudged me. I almost forgot she was there.
"Are you OK?" asked Polly in a well-composed tone she always has.
"Oh yes, thank god!" I pulled Polly in closer for a hug, we could have all died in there!
"Good, I guess all of us are. Did you notice something strange between Arthur and Manny?" patting my hand and looking in another direction.
I then saw what she meant. Manny was standing on the other side of the street talking on the phone while Arthur was talking to an elderly neighbor who was wearing her nightgown.

Le Me, Blogging from the Comfort of My Campus' Internet

2011-11-21T10:08:00.001+01:00

There are just a lot of things running through my head lately and I just need to sort things out. God, I'm a consistant procastinater.

I've been trying to get a lot of work done (work here; study and preparing for exams), hence the blogging from class.

Oh great, live blogging at it's best. Class has just been cancelled. Good thing that I've dragged myself out of bed this morning, gets my body clock working at the least. I went to bed at 2 O'clock yesterday, preparing my letter of appeal for JPA.

I'm really glad that I've take talking to my mother. It does give me the drive I need. How immature I was in thinking that ignoring my family's problem would get me anywhere.

So I guess I should get cracking on my Materials subject.

Media Whores

2011-11-01T21:19:00.001+01:00

Why do you blog?

"Dah sibuk-sibuk sekarang ni, senang sikit nak update dengan family dan kawan-kawan yang duduk jauh-jauh"

"Hidup I ni memang best. I just have to share it with others. I dah la cute, kena la share dengan orang yang takut nak tegur-tegur I in real life."

"I write shit so that I won't go insane keeping all my thoughts in my head"

guess where I stand?

Bloggers CANNOT call themselves writers. Unless they have published their own book. Then again you have bad writers and good writers. I still stand to my Facebook status update: all writers can be bloggers, but only a few bloggers can be writers.

Especially la dekat Malaysia blogger naik status jadi artis. What someone has to explain to me is why? A lot of them don't even write shit worth reading, harap gambar je lebih (Nabil jangan terasa ye, I tengah sakit hati tengok gambar gedik ex-schoolmate perasan peliks on Facebook). The only explanation; internet Malaysia lembap, nak layan netflix or movie2k tak boleh, layan blog ah.

Gua tak marah sebenarnya, tapi tak ada apa lah nak dibanggakan kalau Nuffnang kau dapat RM200 sebulan. Setakat nak sibuk gebang sebab orang suka tengok gambar kau buat muka itik yang kau tangkap 100 kali untuk angle paling flatering, baik kau pergi tolong mak kau basuh pinggan atau ajar adik kau mengaji.

Untuk 'Bloggers' Malaysia yang jealous ramai orang buat blog untuk raih Clicks per View, diorang pon 'Bloggers' gak bai. TROLOLOL. Hangpa juai muka itik hangpa, depa juai tajuk post sensasi depa. Genius, no?

LOL, aku kesian siapa yang subscribe blog aku ni. Penuh sampah-sarap untuk minda. Tapi aku sayang hangpa!

Old Man Crush

2011-10-28T20:59:00.001+02:00

Peter Zwegart; cuba teka dia suka posing macam mana =D

2011-10-27T21:15:00.004+02:00

thus, I will drown myself in our pop-culture reads

We Drone

2011-10-26T16:42:00.001+02:00

HMMMPPHH

Two more months till London. Two more months to slim down, or else my granddad will hint I am too fat, again. It's not that he wants to get to me. It's a subtle way of him saying I used to look, 'healthier'.

Time to start a new ritual. 6K jog. Hey, if those fatties can do a 10K run, I could surely do a 6K lame-ass jog. Maybe I should quit the gym. I only do cardio most of the time anyway.

Lesboner; Kat Dennings

2011-10-26T16:33:00.000+02:00

Hi Kat,

you give me a lesboner. I made up that word just now, and I really think someone should give me some kudos to that. Or maybe I did read it somewhere. Who knows. I believe in neotic science.

Sincerely,
Siti

How to Effectively Clean Your Toilet Bowl

2011-10-18T21:13:00.000+02:00

When your toilet duck just doesn't help, use WHITE VINEGAR.

Dulu asyik tertanya-tanya, macam mana la orang putih ni bulih dok muntah peluk toilet bowl. Sampai sini tahu la macam mana depa jaga. Allerdings, thats what I do now. Tiada segan silu kalau nak peluk toilet bowl untuk muntah.

But since a few months my toilet hasn't been that, erh, white anymore. After googling and deciding not to spend any money on krasse cleaning chemicals, I decided to use white vinegar.

I emptied out my toilet bowl with a small plastic glass. It was nearly completely dry and I poured in the vinegar. After an hour I came back with a sponge, it really didn't need that much elbow grease! I flushed it, used my toilet brush again, and voila, looks almost like new!

Good luck!

German Girl Problem #1

2011-10-16T22:20:00.000+02:00

Overheard this on the tram a couple of days ago from a kinda pretty german girl; roughly translated

"I can't really wear everything you know. I can't really wear colors to a party, sometimes I'm just to pale, you know."

Embrace your palesness!

I Eat Red Meat

2011-10-16T19:56:00.001+02:00

There is just nothing quite like that feeling when you wake up and it's freezing and you get to cuddle in for as long as you like in bed.

Then there's lunch leftovers which taste absotively amazeballs (even if it's cold) because you did your Sunday cooking (I must make this a tradition).

I don't understand people who are angry and upset with life when they're actually really blessed. Those who have less are the ones who count their blessings the most.

I Found Three Martyoshkas!

2011-10-06T22:33:00.002+02:00

Ok, they aren't matryoshka dolls. But they are just so frikkin' cute! We have a few back home, which my uncle bought in Russia. But these are adore-balls too!!!

They are quite petite to be regular cups, which make them that much more ADORBS! But I saw them and I just HAD to buy them. They were priced at 50cents each, however could I say no?

The Perfect Pancakes with Honey

2011-10-03T11:38:00.006+02:00

Ingredients

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
3 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon white sugar
1 1/4 cups milk
1 egg
3 tablespoons butter, melted

Directions

In a large bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar. Make a well in the center and pour in the milk, egg and melted butter; mix until smooth.
Heat a lightly oiled griddle or frying pan over medium high heat. Pour or scoop the batter onto the griddle, using approximately 1/4 cup for each pancake. Brown on both sides and serve hot.

Source: allrecipes.com

Autumn is Here!

2011-09-28T19:55:00.000+02:00

I Hate Adele

2011-09-21T09:17:00.001+02:00

I hate her for making all those heartbreak songs.

Her song that I hate the most would be "Someone Like You".

I hate that it reminds me of you.

I hate that she is singing my heartbreak all over again, like it was just yesterday.

How does she know what I've been trying to hide from everyone?

How does she make me cry a bucket everytime I click on that youtube video?

Dear Adele, everytime I watch this, I tell myself "No, I'm not going to cry". When you start singing, I start crying.

Boyfriend Orang Putih

2011-09-16T11:06:00.000+02:00

Time kecik-kecik, kita tengok all those Disney movies. Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White, etc, semua ada Prince Charming. SEMUA muka mat salleh, kan? Dua je filem old school yang color-friendly; Aladdin and Jungle Book. I was one of those girls yang suka berangan jadi princess menunggu Prince Charming. Prince Charming yang mat salleh tu leww.

Being a student in Germany has definitely put me out of this dream. Dulu time darjah satu, kami pergi sekolah kat Glasgow, makbapak buat Masters la kan. Dekat situ la actually dah start thinking orang mat salleh ni normal je. Sama je dengan kita. Ada yang baik, ada yang tolol, ada yang pandai, ada yang patut campak dalam gaung.

Mungkin sebab patah hati, kecewa dengan first love yang orang jerman, dan doa-doa banyak untuk tenangkan hati, god gave me a chance to get to know a lot of beautiful (inside and out) people this year. People who have helped me get through my own struggles, because they lived through it too, and succeeded-lah. Not forgetting getting to know people in my life better and apreciating their presence in my life.

Post ni sebenarnya about us, malaysian girls. Yerla, Happy Malaysia Day everyone :)

As of right now, I have landed nearly 20 hours ago, in Germany. Everything went well, I even tarik my bags (50kilos) myself on the train (jimat duit/adventure) wearing 4 and a half inches wedges. Hamagad, kan?

I think all women are beautiful, provided they are honest with themselves, which make them honest to other people. Kalau tak; see above- campak dalam gaung. What I don't understand is, is the obsession of some malaysian women dengan orang putih. Selalunya malaysian women yang tak pernah jumpa orang putih la, termasuklah degree-holder dari UTP =D

Malaysian men are a work of art too! True, sometimes they are helpless with chores, nak goreng telur pun fail, but really, they still have this primitive provider instinct. 90% memang akan bagi duit, belanja makan, belikan hadiah best-best, ataupun kalau cinta SMS tu, belikan top-up. Mana ada orang putih macam ni!!! Pergila keluar date dengan diorang, selalu yang normal-normal will let you pay. Saya sebagai wanita malaysia, ada terasa nak menitik air mata tawwww.

OK, bukan I nak cakap 100% orang malaysia lagi bagus dari boyfriend mat salleh. Tapi kena tengok keadaan. Those I nampak happy and memang soulmates, have had their shares of ups and downs. Selalu cara berkenalan diorang tu yang paling amusing/sweet/rom-com inspired. Kalau yang kenal dari internet tu minta maaf la ye, I think its a waste of time/ takkan bahagia dunia akhirat. Hamikkaw. And mostly these ladies with their mat salleh spouses are down-to-earth women. Bukan gila glamour, happy in their own skin, ehrlich, jujur, ikhlas. Yerla, kalau tak macammana diorang boleh guide muslim reverts, kan?

Yang bikin panas was when we had our open house. Ada la mamat jerman sesat sekor kat open house I. Okla, dia tak sesat, dia 'abang angkat'/'abang pungut' tak ada siapa nak. Pastu ada la my brothers friend yang sanggup melayan dia, walaupun boyfriend ikut sekali. Bayangkan betapa tak senonoh perangai perempuan ni. Rumah aku plak jadi port dia tunjuk galak, depan boyfriend sendiri. Andre pulak (mamat jerman tersebut) memang galak -Andre kau bajet boleh cakap melayu kan, faham tak blog I ni? Kalau tak faham jangan nak gebang pandai cakap melayu ye. Statement bodoh 2011 "FOREIGN MEN TREAT THEIR WOMEN BETTER". Please Liza, got get some self-respect.

Please sistahs, orang putih BUKAN SEMUA lagi baik dari orang Malaysia. Hari raya hari tu, I got to know a german lady who is happily married with a malaysian man, orang dari kampung (dan mereka still duduk kampung). And this lady BUKAN kerja cleaner, buat PhD beb.

Well, lets all pray that we find 'The One' that He has promised for us. Regardless color, nationality. Dan kalau sudah jumpa, 1000 tahun happiness together. Amen.

2011-09-11T21:47:00.000+02:00

It is happier
to have a home full of shabby things
but merry with laughter and screams

then it is
to have a house full with silver and designer furniture
but cold and silent

Monday Biru

2011-09-05T08:28:00.000+02:00

Amagad, it's already the 5th of the month!

Lagi sepuluh hari kena naik kapal, pulang kembali menuntut ilmu.

Azam baru; 24. 140.

2011-08-22T13:11:00.002+02:00

susah kan, kalau bapak kedekut dengan keluarga sendiri, tapi belanja perempuan (serta anak-anak haram dia) yang lain. nasib baik la mak aku ada duit jugak

Perempuan yang Sangat Feminin, Angelina Jolie Pun Kalah

2011-08-19T16:00:00.000+02:00

This is because, this indian lady has two wombs. Yes, you read it right. Uterus dia ada dua. Angelina Jolie yang boleh sayang (I use sayang here, not jaga, since dia mesti ada ramai nannies) ramai anak-anak angkat pun ada satu je.

Logik tak kalau dia derma satu uterus dia untuk perempuan yang ada masalah 'tak melekat'? (Whatever the hell that means, aku tak kahwin lagi)

So, technically, they are not twins at all! Ada bilik berasingan gitew dalam perut mak.

Source : weirdnewsasia

iPhone vs Android vs Blackberry

2011-08-18T22:14:00.001+02:00

Consider this if you are socially insecure!

source: CSectionComics

Indoor Swimming Pool di Cina, Mana Air?

2011-08-18T14:25:00.001+02:00

Inilah yang jadi kalau rakyat ramai sangat. Depa kawal ekonomi dunia, tapi nak main air kena belaga bontoi dengan lautan manusia. Kau sanggup?

Kalau aku lah, single-and-ready to mingle, beli je kolam budak-budak, letak tengah rumah, isi air, kodek kaki. Nak nekkid pun takda siapa kisah!

Source: Daily Mail

Thoughtless Thursday

2011-08-18T09:13:00.000+02:00

Orang lain ada Wordless Wednesday, I have "Thoughtless Thursday" (18PL)

I am dedicating this day towards improvement of my physique. Hey, cool I just made that up.

But since it's supposed to be thoughtless... I will not put a lot of my thoughts down. Computers are thoughtless =D

New indoor sport obsession: Jump Rope. The rope itself is cheap! Not even RM30. But then again, I find a lot of things in Malaysia cheap! Mine even came with a counter!

Right now, I'm just doing a normal paced jump, no criss-cross, no double jump, etc. I started with 400jumps a day, my target is 1000jumps.

Umur 12 Jadi Model Underwear, Umur 15 Mengandung

2011-08-16T22:17:00.000+02:00

Tak hairanlah sebab umur 12 tahun dah posing maut tanpa baju. Tapi at least dia berazam nak jadi ibu yang baik, bukan flush anak dalam toilet.

Laporan asal dari Daily Mail

Missing Someone You Didn't Get to Know That Well

2011-08-13T16:36:00.004+02:00

It does feel kind of strange. Thinking about someone you never really knew. Thinking to yourself "Hmm, she died too young".

My neighbor passed away two days before I arrived in Malaysia. It was totally surreal. She died at a young age of 51. Her youngest daughter isn't even 15. I know this post is a bit overdue. I really didn't want to believe it myself...

Whenever I called home, my mom would say she was in the hospital. She was hospitalised for more than three months. From what my mom told me, she was in a really bad state, passively telling me our neighbor would not survive. I didn't even want to passively hear that.

She is a Kelantanese, just like her husband. A kelantanese family. Before I knew Kelantan stereotypes, I used to think Kelantanese were just like her and her husband. I never saw them sulking. There was always a smile on their faces, really. I remembered her gossiping with my mom and the other ladies in our neighborhood. She never bragged and was the one who was always making jokes about herself and lighting up the mood.

During Raya, they would never fail to hold an open house. The first nasi dagang memories I had were during raya at their house. Even when we can't make it, she would call us and ask us to come when we could, cooking up an extra batch of nasi dagang, just for us.

When we were smaller, my older brother and I used to play a lot with the second son. Good times, good times. And what really makes me sad is that I knew him. He was a nice boy. I didn't get to know his sisters because they were too young to come play with us.

However, knowing him, and knowing the fact that we have known each other for more than 15 years now, makes me feel weird. Now being 22 years old means we have seen each other grow up, we knew each other families and seen them ofter than we have visitied our relatives. It makes you feel like family. It makes you think it's unfair that she is already gone.

Thinking of the fact that our neighbor is gone kind of deprivates me of the 'normal' life at home. She was a part of my picture of home. And knowing her family moves me to tears. A kind couple, good neighbors.

2011-08-11T20:29:00.001+02:00

dying for a fag

Missing My Little Apartment

2011-08-09T21:26:00.000+02:00

...missing my little desk

and ofcourse my shiny TV!!!

and my old faithful couch!

though a bit too soft, my BIG BED!

which girl doesn't miss her wardrobe?...

...I miss my sweet little apartment

My Rainbow Cake

2011-08-08T17:06:00.001+02:00

Happy 24th Birthday dear brother!

My older brother mind you. I spent around two hours slaving on this cake. The cost of the ingredients; not so high! It turned out pretty, didn't it?

I compared a few online recipes. It's basically baking and layering. I didn't put any frosting between the layers, that would've been to many egg whites!

Personally, I think mixing all the colors together is pretty too, this layering thing is a lot of work!

I did a simple creamy cheese icing. Basically icing sugar, a little butter and a packet of Philadelphia's cream cheese.

Butterbeer Recipe

2011-08-07T02:27:00.000+02:00

Taken from MuggleNet

Ingredients:

1 cup (8 oz) club soda or cream soda
½ cup (4 oz) butterscotch syrup (ice cream topping)
½ tablespoon butter

Directions:

Step 1: Measure butterscotch and butter into a 2 cup (16 oz) glass. Microwave on high for 1 to 1½ minutes, or until syrup is bubbly and butter is completely incorporated.

Step 2: Stir and cool for 30 seconds, then slowly mix in club soda. Mixture will fizz quite a bit.

Step 3: Serve in two coffee mugs or small glasses; a perfectly warm Hogwarts treat for two!

Daging Masak Kicap

2011-08-03T11:27:00.002+02:00

I've been doing this dish, like, a thousand times. But it's always nice to try another version!

Bahan-bahan

400 gram daging
3 sudu besar kicap manis
1 sudu besar kicap pekat
1/2 biji bawang besar
2 inci halia
1 biji bawang putih)
1 batang kayu manis
2 kuntum bunga lawang

cili padi
1/2 cawan air
sedikit minyak untuk menumis
1/2 biji bawang besar ( dihiris kasar)

Caranya
1. Mula-mula blender bawang besar, bawang putih dah halia hingga hancur, ( kalau nak hiris nipis pun boleh) panaskan minyak dan tumis kayu manis dan bunga lawang, kemudian curah bahan kisar tadi dan lada kisar, tumis hingga naik bau dan agak garing.

2. Kemudian masukkan kicap manis dan kicap pekat, selepas itu masukka daging dan 1/2 cawan air, pastikan daging tenggelam, masak daging hingga empuk dan kuah kicap tadi menjadi pekat, sesuaikan rasa, masukkan garam dan sudu kecil gula, jika daging belum empuk boleh tambah air, akhir sekali masukkan bawang besar yang dihiris kasar dan kacau hingga bawang agak layu, angkat dan hidangkan. Selamat Mencuba.

( kalau nak rebus daging sampai empuk pun boleh, bila masak tu boleh kurangkan kuantiti airnya)

(cara-cara memasak dicopy and paste dari sini)

Mulutku (dan Jari Jemariku) are UNSTOPPABLE

2011-07-28T09:26:00.000+02:00

Duduk rumah banyak la masa fikir benda-benda yang tak logik, aneh, komisch dan tak masuk akal. Antara musing-musing yang gua tengah reneh dalam kepala otak;

1. budak perempuan cantik yang tak berapa pandai dalam sains dan ilmu hisab; jangan dipaksa-paksa! Umur mereka 10 tahun, masukkan ke dalam kelas-kelas menjahit, memasak, menari dan menyanyi. Groom depa jadi ibu mithali, depa confirm kawin awai punya. Anak cantik-cantik, terjamin kecantikan orang Malaysia dan population boom.

2. aku ada can tak couple dengan Remy Ishak? Agak-agak dia suka tak wanita 'sihat' macam aku.

3. nak kahwin super duper lambat. Kira-kira 8 tahun sebelum menopause so that aku boleh dapat anak 4 orang. Beranak setahun, rehat setahun x4. So 45 (jangkaan janin sihat) - 8 = 37. Pastu kalau tak ada jodoh dengan saper-saper, kahwinlah umur 45 dengan Maar, nyiangnyiangnyiang.

4. penggunaan coupons dan bukan duit untuk penerima Hartz IV. Biarla ada kewujudan black market, asalkan duit orang lain tak kurang bayar tax for their sorry buttholes.

OK, akak nak balik kampung japgi. Penang, here I come, yayayayayaya

When I lose 30 Kilos...

2011-06-28T20:43:00.002+02:00

I'll try out for Germany's Next Top Model (probably won't even come through the door) and buy myself Louboutin's

Find your Malaysian Muse

2011-06-04T21:06:00.000+02:00

Misi : Kuruskan badan. Cari muse. Kalau jadikan Heidi Klum yang lepas bersalin terus buat Victoria Secret show, memang jadi bullimic la aku. So I've picked three of Malaysia's beautiful ladies.

1. Vanida Imran

When I look at her, she's got this amazing set of almond-shaped eyes. Definisi kecantikan, keayuan orang Melayu. She's poised and I'd put her in a Marc Jacob. Rich, ethnic colors with a modern cut really does suit her!

2. Maya Karin

One of the meist gefragt actresses atm! She's a mix of everything! It's the best of both worlds. Crazy jawlines and that south east asian taint! Gucci's the dress!

3. Last but not least, TIZ ZAQYAH!

The IT girl of malaysia soaps. I loveeeeeeeeed Nur Kasih, can't wait to go back to Malaysia to watch the movie. But what really caught my attention was her appearance in Dove's advertisement from a few years back. Next-door-girl material and a bag of chips! Louis Vuitton, please suit her up!

Crop Your Pictures, Lie about Your Weight with Them!

2011-06-01T08:18:00.000+02:00

I've gained A LOT of weight in 2 years. Relationships and heartbreaks have made me lost more than 30 kg and my mom's cooking and family visits made me gain around 30 kilos =D It's all good, every kilo has a tale to tell

I miss having seeing my collar bone and defined jaws, though! We're all pretty in our way, but being lighter, is somehow 'befreiend'.

Truth be told, I'm writing this post to show you guys (who I ♥ ) just how much I've put on weight. Don't be fooled by my profile pictures on my Facebook please! But hey, who knows how much I'll lose weight in the few weeks ;)

see how chubby i am from the side =D

cropped AND edited!

Kisses =)

Peraturan-peraturan Merepek di Malaysia

2011-05-16T19:49:00.000+02:00

Kadang-kadang, merepek tak semestinya selalu negatif. Merepek patut diklassifikasikan sebagai salah satu cara thinking-out-of-box. Antara peraturan-peraturan yang borderline merepek kat jermang ni:

1) time salji, hangpa kena sodok salji/tabur garam depan rumah; time ni la garam kat kedai habis, no joke. Kalau ada passerby yang terduduk, pungkok lebam tak boleh pergi kerja, atau pemain hoki tersembam depan rumah hang patah kaki, hang boleh kena saman. Implikasi di Malaysia: kalau ada sampah melampau sampai lengau hitam mai sekampung depan rumah hang, hang pon boleh kena saman. Kemonla Malaysians, tunjukkan kita pon maju, jangan dok biaq sampah berjejer depan rumah, ok? Lepas tu kalau ada orang buang sampah, pun kena saman. Duit saman tu dapat kat orang yang menangkap gambar pembuang sampah. Laf uols

2) nak barbeque (betul ke ni eja), pun ada designated place. Pernah jadi kat kami, salah tempat bbq, mana la nak tahu, noob kan, polis mai, huhu. Tersesak nafas 8saat ingat dia nak check passport ke apa. Rupanya nak tegur je, "tempat bbq 200m ke kanan ye, saudara dan saudari". Lebih kurang macam tu la dia cakap, tapi bahasa jerman la, bukan bahasa melayu. Implikasi di Malaysia: kalau nak bukak gerai penjaja kat designated place. Okla, fine. Bukan perlu ada authority kat sini, because I think this is one of Malaysia's colorful sides. Tapi bang, agak-agak. Kuih sedap tapi tepi container sampah, tekak mual nak makan.

3) lepas pukul 10malam tak boleh buat bising. Kalau jiran you tegur, you tak diam-diam jugak, polis akan mai pukoi hang, eh takderla, diorang sound je; which is enough to bagi you cuak (polis kat sini, paling pendek 180cm, standard 190, ada beran nak gado dengan dorg?). Implikasi di Malaysia: kasik sejam setengah lebih la, lepas pukul 11.30malam dah tak boleh buat bising lepas tu and hari Ahad tak boleh buat bising sebelum pukul 9pagi - kau tebuk lubang kat jamban pukul 7 pagi hari Ahad, aku rasa macam nak tebuk lubang kat kepala kau.

4) diskaun yang banyak untuk pelajar-pelajar! Everywhere we go here, we'll ask for students rate. Kalau nak masuk muzium ke, dapat diskaun. Plus kami dapat semester tiket, boleh naik train dan bus dengan potongon hampir atau lebih dari 50% dalam zon tertentu yang selalu lebih 50km. Implikasi di Malaysia: bagi la potongan juga. Dahlah students di Malaysia dapat duit lagi kurang, ibu bapa kena tambah sikit. Bayangkan kalau yang ibu bapa pun tak banyak duit, nak balik kampung halaman pun mampu dua tiga kali sahaja setahun.

Okla, sikit-sikit peraturan merapu cukup la kan. Nanti kalau banyak sangat, semua orang tumbuh uban. Biar orang fikir merepek, tapi kalau peraturan-peraturan tersebut efektiv, why not?

Kpop Malaysia, Mpop? Mop? KoMop?

2011-05-10T00:32:00.000+02:00

Sedikit startling bila issue ini timbul. Sampai sekarang I tak tahu if it's a geniously planned parody or möchtegern attitude, wannabe sedikitlah.

Eg 1

Tak tahu la depa ni betoi ka tak. Ada macam gaya uni-students yang tengah menganjeng Super Junior

Eg 2

Sighs. I'm not sure who they were mocking here. Guy on the right, not bad la, guy on left, why you showing your rib cage???

Eg 3

Pretty girls indeed. Reminds me of 'Serabut Weh' singers (link below)

Setakat ni I belum tengok diorang menyanyi. I'm all up for it. I am not kutuk-ing anyone here. I just find it a bit weird. Kalau mahu jadi k-pop, bukankah yang laki-lakinya perlu bermuscle dan bersix-pack? Dan kalau mahu berpakaian singkat, ergo skirt pendek, kakinya perlu kurus untuk tampak sweet dan tidak sebegitu montok?

Video Serabut Weh, enjoy!

Adam???

2011-04-29T11:03:00.000+02:00

from Perez Hilton

2011-04-28T23:55:00.000+02:00

ZZ, biar pun kau sekarang milik orang lain... Diam cintaku terhadapmu menunjukkan aku memang setia. Aku harap kau berbahagia disampingnya

Tahniah Buletin Utama TV3 kerana memalukan Malaysia

2011-04-28T21:38:00.000+02:00

ada ka TAJUK UTAMA BULETIN UTAMA pasal video seks??? BODOWH sumpah aku nak emo kat sini

PLEASE LA! What the hell man?! This is a fucking joke?! Memang la kontroversi benda tu, tapi perlu ke 5 minit pertama tunjuk video hitam putih orang tua tengah nak pakai seluar. Perlu ke rekodkan komentar dari orang tua dalam politik yang apparently have his own oppinions tu. Oh, interestingnya!!!

Seriously, tak malu ke TV3? If I was a foreigner in Malaysia for a few weeks, and happen to turn into news and saw that report, I'd be like, WTF? Don't Malaysians have anything better to do than watch vague videos of an old man?

I seriously don't know what the producers of TV3 were thinking when they let that certain report go on air. Benda-benda memalukan memang akan jadi tajuk utama. Tapi tak boleh ke tajuk utama pasal recent kejayaan Malaysia in any field? Or am I just delustional in thinking malaysia does have spurts of success in certain areas other than video-video lucah yang memalukan???

Macam ni ke bila aku balik summer ni?

The Reason Why We are Fat

2011-04-26T01:00:00.000+02:00

I blame the media for making us fat and making us want to be thin again.

E.g 1: guy asks girl out on a date (think of any romantic comedy). What do they do on a date? They e-a-t
E.g 2: where do the F-R-I-E-N-D-S hang out? In Central Perk, drinking loadsa coffee and/or eating cookies and muffins. Look at Rachel, Phoebe, Monica. They don't have no frikkin' double chin.
E.g 3: family (think of any family comedy) at the table eating dinner. What do they eat? Loadsa mashed potatoes on the table, or mac 'n cheese, or some fried chicken. They don't show you no chicken broth. Who doesn't feel like wanting to eat?!
E.g 3: guy and girl go to catch a movie (again, think of any rom-com). There's a huge tub of Coke and popcorn. Say whuuuutttttt. Now you need to go get some snacks!!!

Thereby, my conclusion is, we are fat not because we don't exercise or eat healthy meals. We are fat because them damned corporate bastards have allied with movie makers and TV producers to send us subliminal messages to eat more. Hence, upping sales of their products increasing revenue.

WE ARE ALL VICTIMS I TELL YOU!!!

Rindu

2011-04-23T00:06:00.000+02:00

Kakak rindu la kat Lukman

Lukman ingat tak Kakak selalu bawak Lukman main game arcade kat seksyen 9 dulu? Mak selalu bagi satu baldi kecik nata de coco penuh dengan syiling. Selalu kita main air hockey. Dulu kakak would always win. Lepas tu Lukman jadi tinggi gila. Sekarang tinggi sangat. Kakak nak tengok Lukman pon kena dongak.

Ingat tak kita selalu main lawan jari ibu. Kakak amazed la, dulu Lukman main jugak dengan Kakak eventhough Lukman punya jari keciiikkk je. Sekarang Kakak rasa kalau kita main, patah jari Kakak Lukman tekan.

Tahun ni Lukman tak boleh visit Kakak, sebab Lukman PMR. Kakak believe you can do it. But don't forget to have fun, asyik study je tapi kalau otak dah tepu tak boleh jugak!

Sekarang ni Lukman dah 15 years old. Kakak ingat jer birthday Lukman, 9th of April, macam A. Samad Said, tapi Lukman lagi macho la dari dia. Dulu Kakak kena basuh berak Lukman, tahu taaaaaakkkkk, geli tau!

Ok, study hard, have fun, jangan lupa semayang!

Dalam gambar ni Lukman lagi kecik dari Kakak!

...

2011-04-19T21:10:00.000+02:00

an manchen Tagen ist es schwer, nicht an dich zu denken
an manchen Tagen ist es einfacher, nicht an dich zu denken

was ich eigentlich schreiben wollte,
heute war einer der Tagen, wo es nicht so einfach war

Nailpolish Spring '11

2011-04-19T19:58:00.001+02:00

Well I'm not updated in colortrends anymore. So I went to the bookstore, and the first color that I saw in the pages was orangey-red and fell in love. I think it was in in '08. So that's my spring color,

I wear nail polish. Don't judge me xP

WOW WOW WOW

2011-04-18T23:42:00.000+02:00

Scene 1

Place: XYZ street with high end stores
Time: peak shopping time

There's a leggy brunette/ blonde. 20ish, in an of-the-catwalk outfit. Everyone's looking at her, even you. You're not jealous, even a little humbled with your discounted last season Zara clothes.

well don't...
just because her parents made a good-looking child doesn't mean she's any better than you! Oh wow, she can afford all those high-end brands. Wonder how she got 'em. (Prolly swiped her credit card, daddy dearie gave to her). She was born in a life of comfort, you weren't. That doesn't make her more sprecial than you.

Scene 2

Place: in front of a discount grocery store
Time: 5 / 6pm, after your last class

So you're carrying your backpack from your last class. Your back's aching and your brain just seemed like it has deflated, like a tyre without pressure. You've got your groceries and the lady in front of you is a 30-something lady with mousy messy hair juggling two little boys. The older one is throwing a small tantrum, You noticed she's got a big grey smudge on her shoulder and promise yourself you won't go shopping alone when you have kids.

well think again...
She's a single mom, juggling two jobs and two little boys. It's no wonder she doesn't have time to do her hair. Her husband left her for best friend, without any financial help. She has to wake up at 5am in the morning, pack her kid's stuff to be sent of to day-care. At 8am she has been on her feet for two hours, waitressing. After that she has to rush to her next job, washing dishes at a pizzeria. At 6pm she finally gets to pick up her kids. After her kids are asleep is the only time she is allowed to sit down and have time for herself.

which lady are you impressed by?

Geram. Masih Gemuk

2011-04-13T06:43:00.000+02:00

Cermin whole body dalam bilik saya memang bodow, ke cerdik terlampau. I think the cermin is dented in so a way, it makes you look slimmer. Sumpah tak hiperbola. The thing is, when I look in the mirror I go, "Hey, I'm looking good here. Not fat at all!'. Shit reality pelempang aku apabila pergi kedai juai cermin, then I go, "Shit girl. You really gotta stop eating so much".

cermin tertuduh

Semalam lepas pergi gym, makan. Hari ini balik rumah lepas setel lab, kemas bilik tak habis, makan. Cammana nak jadi gagah perkasa. Lemak terbina ada aah. Nanti balik Malaysia famili tak kenai muka dah, besaq sangat jadi. Baju semua ketat, pakai pon malu nak tengok diri dalam cermin. Dulu elok ja ambik gambaq posing. La ni dah tak sejuk dah, tak payah pakai baju tebai, habih nampak semua.

Maka dengan ini, saya, Siti Hafizah akan berjanji tidak malas untuk bersukan dan makan-makanan sihat demi diri sendiri, keluarga dan negara!

bunga tulip dapat free

Cerita Panas

2011-04-07T11:00:00.000+02:00

I rasa Zed Zaidi tak berminat dengan kaum hawa. What do you think?

My Nights Crying in Bed

2011-04-05T09:17:00.000+02:00

There was a time when I cried myself to sleep. The pain was unbearable. Sleep was an escape, but as soon as reality hit me again, I just wanted to cry. It was with me everywhere I went.

No, I'm not depressive. Boy troubles? Wie bitte? Nein, meine Liebe. Frikking backaches! My back was so sore that I tried almost everything, but nothing went away! Hot water bottles, grain pillows, massages, hot baths, you name it, I tried it.

I tried changing some things to see what the cause was. I thought it was my mattress. Nope, it's fine. Maybe it was because of my, erm, womanly assets; nah, I go comando at night. And then, I changed my campus bag to a backpack. WTH, OMG, F$%=! It was my campus bag ALL THIS WHILE! This is the bitch culprit:

My pains were on my lower right back. I carry this bag on my right shoulder, no wonder the pains were only on my right side!

This is the backpack that I am carrying now. It looks a lot less cooler than my old capus bag -.- But I don't cry myself to sleep anymore =)

Ich Muss Mal Nörgeln

2011-04-03T09:21:00.002+02:00

Krank. Heuschnupfen. Wasserfall aus der Nase; ihh. Whatevs

EXAM

2011-03-08T16:40:00.002+01:00

Kurung diri sendiri dalam rumah
Merapu pon sorang-sorang

h
a
i
h

Keluarga di Jerman

2011-02-17T23:24:00.000+01:00

Tinggal sebatang kara kat negara orang. Kadang-kadang sedih dan buat kita murung. Rasa macam kemurungan selepas bersalin, tapi lebih sunyi. Fine, tak pernah bersalin, but ye geddit?

So I's went to Raunheim, berhampiran Frankfurt mengunjungi Kak Liza dan Abang Razif serta anak mereka Liya, (nama kak Liza kena tulis dulu, alphabetical order, and Liya tulis last sebab baru 'dihasilkan').

Tetiap hari kak Liza masak. Masakan melayu dengan nasi sebab Abang Razif (kenapa kena rahsia!), maka I tompanglah sekaki dua no! Memang berat naik. Pandai kak Liza jaga tetamu.

Pastu-pastu-pastu I jadi Makngah :') First time pangkat makcik. Makngah Siti kepada budak kecik nama Liya. Makngah Siti ajar Liya hi-five, so budak umur 17bulan tu sekarang dah malas nak salam orang, tunjuk tangan kasik hi-five saja. Mintak ampun kepada ibu bapa budak tersebut.

Yang tak bolehnya, nampak aku dok pegang handphone untuk chatting (handphone canggih kan) dia terus buat kepala lentok nak posing. Nak tipu tak boleh sebab dia tunggu flash. Maka terhasillah gambar-gambar berikut:

pose 1: gostan, gostan duduk posing

pose 2: kepala lentok posing dengan apa yang ada

pose 3: tangan kena maintain, manja pon kena maintain

Saya sudah rindu sama itu family di Raunheim. Rinduuuuu, rindu serindu rindunyaaaaaa

Dreaming of Spring

2011-02-01T20:32:00.000+01:00

So, I live alone.

Winter is hitting again.

I wished it was spring.

This picture was taken two springs ago.

Flughafen, Airport.

Not my trip, but I definitely wish I was flying away.

Spring. Where I can wear a t-shirt, with a thin cardigan. No thick wrap-around, and the cool breeze on my neck.

Sometimes when the sun is shining bright enough, even flip-flops. I love the wind between my toes. Feels like you're walking on air.

And when there's nothing to do, cut my jeans, and go to the park with a blanket. My legs would turn bronze.

*sigh* I just have to be a bit more patient. And my toes would have to be happy with the inners of my socks; sorry toes!

The Crazy Weekend Adventure with Ginger Boy

2011-01-11T23:59:00.000+01:00

Last Saturday I decided to go to Osnabrück, to visit Ginger Boy (Christian), at his parents house. Reason: He wanted to go party with a girl he likes. She doesn't like him the way he likes her. So being a good friend, I decided to cheer him up. And hey, life's too short to take it slow!

Turns out my semester ticket covers the journey. Didn't have to pay for the 3 hours journey =D Ginger Boy, being the lasy ass he always is, said I should be there at 5pm, earliest. So when I got there it was already dark. Wanted to take pictures, but too dark =S

We went around town and he showed all the churches, a castle which is now used for lectures, and Hegertor. After that we ate at a chinese restaurant. All-You-Can-Eat; bit of a dissapointment though.

Ginger Boy decided to get hammered. None of his friends showed up, so we went partying together. Two's too boring, so we decided to act as students from Munich (have never been there, stupid GB). We saw a group of girls and guys who were kinda having fun together. GB told the story and they believed us. They were too drunk not too.

Anyways, to sum it all up, a lot of food, a lot of drinks, lots of laughs, and no sleep. Hey, why not do everything when you're still young, right? =)

Keluarga Bahagia

2011-01-08T00:58:00.002+01:00

Tak, ni bukan lagu nasyid tu. This is real life bebeh. I nak tulis pasal families; betul ke eja ni? Tahun ni, I will be turning 23. Huyo. My mom got married when she was 21, finished her ACCA in UK, balik Malaysia, dapat abang I umur 24. Kalau kira-kira, I kena kahwin tahun ni untuk dapat anak sulung time 24. Erk, sorry Mak, tak mampu la.

2009 dan 2010 banyak masalah keluarga. Siapa yang baca blog ni tahula betapa laranya hati I memikirkan semua masalah yang I cannot change. Siapa yang dapat tanggung the fact that 20 tahun perkahwinan, 20 tahun jadi keluarga bersama, tiba-tiba berubah. I didn't know where to hold on anymore.

Tapi 2010 ada hikmah dia. Got to know people who were from happy homes. They were (and still are) happy people.

No, I bukan nak tangkap leleh nyanyi lagu Family Potrait dari Pink. I'm a grown ass woman. I can feed myself, I can clothe myself, I look out for myself. Bukan rezeki tuhan nak bagi kat I ada "keluarga bahagia". I know my parents love me, but everyone has issues, kan...

Point is, I've stopped looking for 'that someone'. I'll be turning 23 in September, but hey, mak aku dulu lawa, slim, chinese look, memangla ada orang minat kat dia. Aku maybe tak dianugerahi her keayuan or her femininity, but hey, I'm still young. I lagi rela tunggu umur 40 untuk someone yang sudi kongsi this journey we call life. Tak hensem takpe, tak kaya takpe, aku pon bukan ada apa sangat pon, janji rajin dan ada matlamat.

Ok, dah malu la nak elaborate. Bye

Keseorangan di Malam Krismas

2010-12-24T23:38:00.004+01:00

No drama, macamlah aku ni kat Malaysia dok raya krismas. Tapi dekat sini macam suasana raya la kan. Balik kampung, buat kuih, makan sama-sama, dapat duit raya dll. Teringat jugakla aku kat mak bapak, toknek, tokwan, segala. Sedih sikit la. Seharian aku dok terlantaq kat katil, sakit perut, petang ok sikit, tengahhari tadi salji lebat ooh. Petang aku keluar, kedai semua tutup. Teringin nak makan waffle, sikit lagi nak menitis air mata. Tapi aku ingat, aku ada beli bahan-bahan nak buat biskut, eherm Gingerbread Man.

ni katil saya, very inviting I know

Sampai-sampai rumah duduk sat, skype dengan member. Member aku pon dok layan blues, aku malas aih nak layan orang jiwa bergelora. So aku pun start misi manusia halia aku.

Ini bahan-bahannya. Tepung, serbuk penaik, gula, serbuk halia, serbuk kayu manis, telur sebiji, air, laptop seketoi

Sambil uli tepung, aku skype la dengan sapa² yang online. Bukan apa, Nabil takdak, dia pi ambik member model dia, Hanis, kat Frankfurt. Darwin pon takdak, dia pi London, nak pi rumah senior laki lain segan, rumah depa kecik sikit, nak pi jalan² ambil angin pon tak boleh, salji tebai, habih semua keretapi tak jalan. Seronok jugak buat biskut, walaupun aku ni bukan suka buat dessert.

Tepung kena uli bagi nipis, tebai 3mm (tips kak Nadia dari Essen). Sikit ja uli tepung, tapi dapat banyak sebab nipih. Aku buat rupa orang salji, bekaih tekap lain taktaw pi mana. Thanks Nabil

End result. Ada yang penyakit kusta, ada yang orang putih, ada yang afrika. Tapi okla, untuk orang buat first try dengan alatan yang tak cukup!

Sekarang aku dok mengunyah biskut-biskut yang terlibat dalam kejadian. Happy =D

Kalau Mak tengah baca ni, Ok tak kakak buat biskut? Ok kan =D

2010-12-20T19:54:00.001+01:00

Joachim Löw

saya minat awak

Hobi di Masa Lapang di Jerman

2010-12-18T11:06:00.003+01:00

makan makanan melayu bersama rakan-rakan. Macam ni memang tak boleh kurus. Duduk sat nak tulis blog saja, terus pikir pasal makanan.
tengok salji luar tingkap sambil pasang heater kuat. Bersyukurlah sebab ada rumah, tak payah dok minta sedekah di luar.
tengok das Perfekte Dinner. Versi jerman, the perfect dinner. Kalau versi Malaysia macam mana ye? Mesti semua masak rendang atau sambal kaw-kaw.
jalan-jalan di luar. Kalau kat Malaysia, bercinta nak berjalan di luar di bawah matahari. Habis basah ketiak.
...rupanya iols ni memang tak banyak hobi?

Being Satisfied with Unperfections

2010-12-13T21:16:00.005+01:00

No, I'm not sinking into a pre-meditated state. My writings are meant to be light-hearted but still enlightening. I had a FANTASTIC weekend. Two days overdosing on malaysian food and football! Ok, the first is definitely one of my leidenschaft but football turned to be surprisingly lovely; without any sarcastic tones =)

As a student, you spend a lot of time in front of your laptop. Tutorials, wikipedia, checking online student online statuses, etc. YEAH RIGHT. Most of the time is spent checking facebook updates and chatting on one of the IM services.

I have a couple of internet friends (never met them, don't intend to). On Saturday after visiting a friend at the hospital, I came online and rang one of my internet friends, just because I was bored. Turns out he was going to watch a football game in Bochum and we decided to catch brunch together. I wasn't quite awake when I dressed for the day. I had a REALLY thin white button-down on and Christian said I should come and watch football. We all predicted the scores and lo and behold, my prediction was true. Guess I can be the next Paul the Sotong.

Thanks Christian, Robert and Martin =)

After Bochum I rushed back to Krefeld. Nabil was cooking, AGAIN! Dahsyat Nabil was totally in the entertaining guests mode. He made curry noodle and bread pudding. Sounds easy, but not really when you're a beginner cooking for 10 people! An eventful weekend with people I care.

The weekend didn't spare me the Monday blues. I woke up with a sad feeling, not really knowing why. The apartment looked like it was hit by a storm. Right now I'm sitting in my warm bed and blogging. I'm doing good. I had ice coffee (I want a java chip, please!) and chocolate dessert. Now I'm happy and ready for the week!

Tepung Goreng

2010-11-08T11:13:00.002+01:00

Seperti tajuk yang tertera, iols ingin bercakap mengenai tepung goreng. Walaupun bunyinya langsung tak membanjirkan air liur, tapi desert yang membuatkan kita semua teruja kebanyakannya ialah tepung yang digoreng.

Contoh-contoh popular ialah donut, kuih keria, karipap, malah KFC kegemaran ramai pon menggunakan tepung goreng untuk menagihkan wiols semua.

Sebelum iols menyimpang dengan lebih parah lagi, iols pergi straight to the point. Iols teringin Churros. Iols dan dik Nab dapat merasa churros semasa Schützenfest di Krefeld hari tu. Wiols memang berjalan jauh untuk membeli, dan ternyata wiols tidak kecewa.

Walaubagaimanapun, cerita yang parahnya. Churros bukan senang didapati. Iols teringin churros. Macammana?

sedarkan diri anda

2010-11-04T18:04:00.002+01:00

ok. Ceritanya iols duduk di jerman. Balik Malaysia je, jumpa sanak saudara ke, sahabat handai ke atau orang kedai, memang terus kena cop 'gadis jerman'. Wah, bunyi macam iols ni mat salleh gitu. Tapi dekat sini, iols la orang yang langsung takde nampak, bau (sebab selalu makan santan kot) atau membawa diri seperti orang jermeng.

Semasa mengbrowse Facebook dengan telefon bimbit iols yang canggih ketika bosan mendengar kuliah, iols terbaca post yang mengingatkan kembali iols. Hidup ni pendek sahaja. Di antara lautan mat salleh mata biru dan rambut blond, kadang-kadang iols lupa. Kita hidup bukan untuk syok saje. Berjoli tu biar bertempat, jangan nanti mati katak kena langgar kereta time tengah (eherm)---

Iols nak ingatkan diri sendiri uols pun dah besar-besar kan?

My Birthday

2010-09-24T08:57:00.005+02:00

I'm 22 now. It's a bit sad not to be celebrating it with the family, but family doesn't have to be biological =)

On 22nd I didn't want to be alone during midnight; that would just make me homesick, so I called Nabil and Darwin if they wanted to have dinner together and watch movies. We went for pizza at a small italian place and had fun chatting and making fun of each other.

We went back and lugged in front of Nabil's laptop, watching Skrip 7707. I was happy just chilling. It's hard to find malaysian company here. Most are boys who don't really want to hang out with a girl *sigh*

A few minutes before midnight, Nabil said he needed to go to the toilet. Not thinking much I just nodded. And struck of midnight he came back with a candle and a cake and Darwin (who was annoying us the whole evening with playing piano online on a website) was striking the happy birthday tune on his virtual piano.

I was really speechless! We wanted to dig in the cake, but Darwin left it in the freezer, so it was frozen.

Thanks for the dozens of wishes on Facebook. I know I'm over here and you guys are over there, but reading your comments on my wall made me remember moments I shared with each one of you.

Oven Meletop

2010-09-08T20:46:00.001+02:00

A'ah, tangan terbakar, sedikit jerla. Sebenarnya nak ucapkan

Terima Kasih kepada Bomba Shah Alam

yang datang dengan cepat untuk periksa keadaan dapur kami. TERIMA KASIH!!!

Nasi Daging Tok Baru

2010-09-06T20:11:00.002+02:00

Resipi ni bini tokwan iols ajar

Ramuan:

Beras

Air

Daging + Tulang

Sup Bunjut

Susu (lembu biasa)

Garam

Gula

Ghee

Kayu Cengkih

Bunga anis

Kardamum

Cara-cara:

1. Rebus daging dan tulang daging. Masukkan sup bunjut dan garam secukup rasa.

2. Menggunakan Ghee, tumiskan rempah ratus tadi, jangan bagi hangit!

3. Air rebusan daging digunakan untuk memasak nasi. Tuangkan sekali rempah yang ditumiskan tadi.

4. Masukkan susu (3 sudu) ke dalam nasi, kacau.

5. Sebelum nasi kering, masukkan daging yang telah direbus dan gaul di dalam nasi dan cium bau nasi, rasa lapar dah kan?

6. Selepas nasi masak, masukkan ke dalam pinggan untuk dihidang.

7. Tumbuk air asam

Resipi Air Asam di dalam post seterusnya =)

Rutin Hari Rabu di Rumah

2010-09-01T12:22:00.003+02:00

Alkisahnya,

setiap hari Rabu, ibunda tercinta pergi mengajar malam. Kelas ibunda bermula sejam sebelum berbuka dan berakhir sejam selepas berbuka. Ibunda memang senantiasa mencuba untuk merapatkan silaturrahim anak-anaknya dengan ayahanda dengan mengaturkan masa untuk kami melakukan sesuatu bersama.

Sememangnya niat ibunda baik, tetapi iols rasa sedikit membuang masa. Ayahanda seperti biasa, datang ke rumah kami, dan menonton tv sebelum menghidang, iols mengurung diri di dalam bilik (berlara dan ketika ini menulis blog), kakanda menggunakan masa ini untuk membuat perkara yang berfaedah dan adinda Lukman keluar mencari sahabat-sahabat. Semua yang terlibat di dalam perancangan ibunda seperti memang tidak mahu menurut serta. Erm, iols rasa kami anak-anak sedikit kurang masam, tetapi itulah yang telah berlaku sejak tiga minggu yang lepas.

Nasib baik hari ini merupakan hari Rabu terakhiar ibunda perlu mengajar di bulan puasa. Iols melihat kelibat ayahanda dan mengingati betapa hipokritnya orang tua yang mempunyai masalah mental ini, masih lagi mempunyai ego bodoh yang tinggi dan tidak cuba untuk mengubah perangai kepada jalan yang benar.

Iols tidak suka konfrontasi yang memang membuang masa ini. Kalau kami adik-beradik cuba, ayahanda sememangnya masih belum sedar betapa perlunya dia mengubah perangai untuk memperbaiki hubungannya dengan anak-anak sendiri. Oleh itu, iols rasa iols juga tidak perlu berusaha untuk berbaik-baik atau bersembang dengan ayahanda sendiri. Setakat hormat dan tidak bertekak sudah cukup, setakat ini.

Haih... Kita tidak perlu marah kepada perkara-perkara yang kita tidak boleh ubah, kita hanya perlu mengubah diri sendiri, bukan? Maka iols tidak marah kepada sesiapa, terutama kepada ayahanda, walaupun mulut iols memang selalu mengurangkan pahala puasa =D

Selepas mengurangkan pahala, eloklah kita top-up apa yang kurang. Iols nak cuba beramal sedikit, tak perlulah iols khabarkan bagaimana. Kurang dari sejam umat Islam di Semenanjung Malaysia akan berbuka. Selamat berbuka, bersahur atau bertarawikh kepada semua yang membaca, di mana pon uols berada!

It's War and It's Not Gonna Be Pretty

2010-08-29T19:37:00.001+02:00

exams are coming up
i'm three quarters set for one paper
but i've got four
this is SPARTAAAAAA!

Update for August

2010-08-29T18:14:00.002+02:00

saya ni busy macam artis,

sorry (to myself) for not updating, but have You ever had that feeling you have soo much to write that you don't know where to start? I'm kinda in that situation right now. Small steps, small steps!

Selamat berpuasa dan beribadah untuk 10 malam terakhir! =)

2010-07-15T14:17:00.001+02:00

apa dok tengok-tengok? takdak kerja lain ka?
tak aih, main ja =)
mai-mai baca na!

Azam Pertengahan Tahun

2010-07-09T14:06:00.003+02:00

nak kurangkan berat badan; kalau tak nanti orang ingat Adibah Noor duduk Germany. I love you Kak Adibah Noor =) Kali ni kasik kaw², ala² boleh masuk pertandingan bina badan
rajin mengulangkaji Kalau mengulangkaji macam minum teh panas kat beranda sambil makan keropok ikan memang tak boleh. Kena mentelaah macam takut cikgu Azmi rotan
tak boros Kita kena berjimat-cermat kan? Bak kata adik IOLS "sikit-sikit lama-lama jadi timbun"
tidak emo Memang IOLS tidak emo, tapi kalau duduk bilik sorang-sorang mulalah nak tulis blog merapu-rapu.

OK, UOLS tolong ingat-ingatkan IOLS ye?

Mein Leben als eine Brücke

2010-07-09T06:33:00.002+02:00

Nach dem Leben, das wir alle kennen, glaube ich daran, dass uns danach ein anderes ewiges Leben erwartet. Deswegen sehe ich dieses Leben als eine Brücke.

Auf dieser Brücke ist man nicht alleine, obwohl man sich manchmal so fühlt. Man versucht auch jemanden zu finden, der einen auf dem Weg durch diese Brücke begleitet. Und weil das Ziel auch gerade wichtig ist, braucht man jemanden, der gemeinsam geht und die Reise leichter macht.

Wenn der liebe Gott es so gewollt hat, dass wir uns später diese Brücke zusammen überqueren, nehme ich deine Hand zweifellos, denn ich werde auch dir auf dem Weg zu deinem Ziel helfen.

My Newest Picture

2010-07-05T22:39:00.002+02:00

I know I haven't been posting regularly lately. I've been eating a lot because my family was there and my mom insisted on cooking what I liked. So this is a new picture of myself

Demam

2010-06-30T08:02:00.002+02:00

IOLS demam, waktu-waktu macam ini IOLS suka merengek sila jangan fikir benda-benda tak senonoh dan inginkan perhatian Mak IOLS yang masih berada di Paris.
Mak, cepat balik Germany, kakak nak Milo

Encik Amir Mohd Saad, with all due Respect, You are A Loser

2010-06-19T22:30:00.004+02:00

My family's coming tomorrow. My brothers, my mom and someone I have to call dad. I miss them (abang, Lukman, Mak) so much but I feel like ripping my dad's teeth out because I know he's been making everyone I love in this world miserable.

After the trip they're going to court to officialize talak dua. Yes, embaressing. How can a 50 year old man with three grown up kids be so stupid? He's been cheating on my mom for literally ten years and hasn't learnt shit to save his soul. He's the lasiest, unmotivated and boastful person I know in my family. He spends most of the time playing golf, acting rich and SEARCHING YAHOO for WOMEN! Hello?! Who the hell does that? NOT just that, he talks crap to us. I got (last year) screamed at because I drank water out of a bottle. Can you GET any more psychotic towards your family?

I feel like driving my brothers and my mom away from him and leave him be. Then he can sit in his office search for women who he can go to cheap hotels. At least he can't lay his crap on us anymore.

Oh, Happy Father's Day

requote "Girls Shouldn't Play Football"

2010-06-16T23:00:00.004+02:00

Dalam hidup zaman 2000 yang moden dan penuh pancaroba, kita masih dibelenggu masalah-masalah yang IOLS kategorikan masalah-masalah zaman batu. IOLS sebenarnya teringat BBQ tahun lepas, adik² buat kat Cologne. IOLS pergi dengan seniors sini.

Selepas kenyang makan, seniors IOLS main sepak-sepak bola. Ala, yang semua orang berdiri dalam satu bulatan and main passing-passing bola. Sebab time tu IOLS dan menambah berat badan, IOLS minta izin join. IOLS disambut dengan baik walaupun IOLS memang kaki bangku.

Sehari selepas itu, IOLS baca status update mamat ni yang juga berada di barbeque tersebut. Bunyik dia lebih kurang "I don't understand why do girls want to play football. You don't see guys playing netball". Time IOLS baca status tu, nasib IOLS waras lagi. Kalau IOLS naik minyak macam gajah usung kayu balak pergi Sungai Kinabatangan, IOLS gerenti mamat berkenaan tidak akan lagi jejakkan kaki di bumi Eropah apatah lagi Jerman.

IOLS rasa tak boleh belah. Status update mamat tu dalam english tapi dia secara tidak langsung menunjukkan betapa kolotnya dan basi pendapat dia macam air liur adik IOLS lepas bangun tidur petang Ahad. IOLS rasa memang bangang dia perumpamakan netball dengan netball. Adakah sambutan netball di kalangan wanita sama dengan sambutan football di kalangan kaum lelaki (not to mention perempuan!) Yang LAGI tak boleh belah, mamat ni langsung tak macho. Jenis yang lembik. IOLS pon tak pasti sexual orientation makhluk ni. Mungkin alat kelamin dia kecil.

IOLS bukan feminis. IOLS sokong poligami. IOLS rasa perempuan pakai skirt dan dresses sungguh menawan, tetapi IOLS suka jugak jejaka yang pakai apron =D Apa yang IOLS nak cakap, kita semua nak hak masing-masing, dan bukan hal orang lain. Perempuan dan lelaki memang dijadikan berbeza. Antaranya; perempuan memang cenderung main masak-masak, lelaki ada better upper body strength.

Tapi yang IOLS tak puas hati, kenapa mamat ni rasa dia punyai hak untuk menentukan apa yang patut, dan apa yang tak patut? Mentaliti macam ini yang membantutkan perkembangan Malaysia. OK, dia graduan Jerman, mungkin faham istilah 'thinking out of the box', tapi gagal untuk mengimplementasikan dalam kehidupan seharian. Besok lusa, orang lain akan terpengaruh dengan pemikiran otak sempit macam tu sebab dia ada sijil dari Jerman.

Kesian Malaysia. Kesian.

Sumpah Kau Poyo, Takpe, Aku Pon Poyo, Kita Semua Poyo

2010-06-05T23:22:00.003+02:00

Merujuk kepada tajuk blog minggu ini (walaupun blog di'update' sesuka hati dan bukan mingguan), IOLS rasa nak menulis dilema-dilema IOLS. Keadaan cuaca di Jerman sudah bertukar menjadi indah berseri tetapi kadang-kadang hati IOLS gundah gulana. IOLS tak tahu kalau perasaan ini normal atau tidak tapi IOLS senaraikan beberapa benda yang buat IOLS gelisah seperti seluar dalam terlekat di celah punggung:

1) Denim on Denim; sememangnya jaket jeans tampak santai dan relax untuk dipakai di siang hari ketika musim panas; tapi UOLS pon setuju, tak payahla nak over kan? Tak payah la nak pakai cenggini
rasa speechless sikit tengok orang macam ni. Rasa nak sepak ada, rasa nak menangis ada. Dalam muzium ada 'polis' jaga bahan-bahan antik atau lukisan, IOLS rasa, kat luar kena ada fashion police yang jaga cara pemakaian orang ramai supaya tidak mencacatkan penglihatan orang lain. Ampun ya bapak Justin, ibu Britney.

2) IOLS sedar, IOLS bukan langsing macam Umie Aida, tapi Adibah Noor pon comel! Kenapa? Sebab kita pakai baju ukur badan sendiri. Tukang jaga pakaian Adibah Noor ukur baju kat badan Adibah Noor, bukan panggil Maya Karin tolong fitting'kan baju. TETAPI ada jugak yang salah beli saiz, akibatnya:Gambar ini sangat famous. Adakah ini jelmaan pelakon-pelakon wanita Desperate Housewives yang 100kilo lebih berat?

3) Mandi seminggu sekali sememangnya tidak cukup. Tambahan pula dalam keadaan cuaca panas. Tetapi kenapa masih ramai yang tidak dapat menerima kenyataan kejam kehidupan ini? Walaupun kebenaran ini bukanlah sesuatu yang mudah untuk kita terima, tetapi kita harus tabah menghadapai cabaran dan tidak berputus asa untuk MANDI serta memakai DEODORAN. Senario yang kerap terjadi di dalam tram adalah ketengikan dan keasidan bau celah ketiak orang yang telah berputus-asa dalam hal-walhal mandi dan penyapuan deodoran selalu menyebabkan IOLS loya tekak seperti ibu-ibu mengandung. Tak payahlah IOLS letak gambar ye =)

4) Mintak maaf jika IOLS ada menyinggung perasaan UOLS. IOLS pon tak sempurna tapi takpe, UOLS poyo, IOLS pon poyo sekali!

Pantun Perut Buncit yang Berkerat-kerat

2010-06-01T23:59:00.003+02:00

Balik dari universiti,
Letak beg bukak kasut,
Letak bontot depan TV,
Bukak coklat masuk mulut.

Macam-macam aku makan,
Nasi dan jugak coklat,
Sambil tengok TV sa telan,
Patutla seluar makin ketat.

Kalau kenyang terus berhenti ,
Bajet lapar je minum air,
Time sampai Malaysia nanti,
Kasik surprise kat KLIA.

Banyaknya aku berangan,
Sambil menulis masih lagi makan,
Macam mana nak turun berat badan,
Kalau mulut asyik menelan.

I can Watch Sunsets on My Own

2010-05-21T11:06:00.003+02:00

The last few months have been an emotional roller coaster. Break ups, parents, labs, self image etc. Being on my own isn't easy sometimes. But life isn't all crap. A lot of things have helped me through;
1. the magic of VOIP and Skype
- mom is just a call away (when she's not busy working) My mom is a strong woman and she never fails to inspire me

2. Chance from Chanel
- when I feel so down I spray some and there's just something about that scent that calms me down and brings me to that 'happy place'

3. black and white movies
- where romancing and gallantry still exists

I just wanna say. I'm doing okay sayangs. I always thing about you guys and I think you think about me too =)

Lifes' Spices with some Asam and Garam

2010-05-10T12:21:00.006+02:00

stressed out with my labs and 'assignments'. I guess thats what you call it when you have to turn up the work!
had a blast in Köln again this weekend, after forcing dik Nabil to teman me. KFC with three other adiks and a coffee sesh in Starbucks.
ALEX dumped me. And we weren't even together =D Was pretty weird you know, but I'm my own man x)
I find sunshine in every day of my life and I am thankful for that. Lets never forget to sing under the sun =)

Love,
Siti

Aku Bingung

2010-05-03T14:23:00.002+02:00

Tajuk yang sungguh melodramatis, tetapi mempunyai sedikit kebenaran disebaliknya. Seperti yang UOLS tahu, makbapak IOLS hari tu were officially divorced. Waaalaaauuupunbegitu, Malaysia ada sistem syariah. Oficially divorced selepas talak satu, dan apabila rujuk balik masih suami isteri sah. IOLS nak bagitau, makbapak IOLS dah rujuk.

Sempena Monday Blues, itu bukanlah tajuk IOLS. IOLS bingung sebab sejak berlepas untuk ke KLIA bulan September, IOLS tak pernah cakap dengan bapak IOLS. Ayahanda ada hantar email kat IOLS, tapi IOLS jawab 2 bulan kemudian. Sebab bapak IOLS memang mempunya masalah peribadi yang telah memberi kesan-kesan buruk kepada IOLS dan adik beradik, apatah lagi mak tersayang.

Jadi IOLS ambil keputusan jawab lambat sebab nak tengok, bapak IOLS dah berubah ke belum. Yerla, nak tulis email 2 minit je, nak betul-betul berubah, dua tahun pun tak tentu. Nampaknya bapak IOLS tak berubah pon. Email IOLS tak dijawab. IOLS tawar hati nak balik Malaysia. IOLS tak nampak jalan untuk tidak lagi berdingin dengan bapak IOLS. KAmi tak bergaduh, cuma tak bercakap.

Cadangan untuk kembali merapatkan silaturrahim tanpa menimbulkan kontroversi amat dihargai! Terima kasih!

Tersenyum Mengenangkan Nasib

2010-04-28T20:03:00.003+02:00

Wah, sungguh puitis aku di petang ini

Antara salah satu gejala di Docland ni, tak kira muda atau pun yang tua, mesti ada yang terasa 'depri'. Perkataan dalam bahasa melayu yang lebih kurang maknanya ialah kemurungan. Kalau aku kat Malaysia dulu, aku ingat mak-mak baru bersalin je ada masalah kemurungan ni. Sebab kalau tengok Oprah yang ada subtitle, 'post-natal stress' dia tulis 'kemurungan selepas bersalin'. Aku rasa dalam kamus tulis benda lain (aku takde kamus dewan bahasa kat sini kawan-kawan), tapi bila aku dengar murung aku teringat ibu-ibu muda yang baru bersalin; yang murung kerana perut boyot dan tidak lagi lincah macam anak dara? Entah, aku tak pernah bersalin.

Wow, jauh aku terpesong. Balik kepada isu utama malam ini. Seminggu dua ini aku rasa tenang sikit, matahari banyak, suhu yang meningkat dan bunga-bunga yang tumbuhlah buat aku rasa macam "ada hati dalam taman". Tapi sejak dari itu la tiga member-member aku kat sini sedikit murung. Climax dia semalam. Sorang tu mengaku kat aku online dia rasa depri, sorang lagi yang aku baru kenal seminggu siap call nak cerita. Takperla, kita semua manusia, aku pon tolong la dengar.

Tetapi la, yang aku tak faham kenapa. Tiga-tiga merupakan jejaka. Maknanya konklusi kemurungan post-natal tak boleh la aku buat, masing-masing tak mampu hamil. Kedua, cuaca yang membuatkan aku ingat pada filem hindustan scene menari-nari pegang pokok yang confirm baut aku nak boifren hindustan / mengilai sorang², boleh ke orang murung sebab tu?

Walaupun aku seorang di sini, sebatang kara, apakan daya, aku rasa OK je. Aku selalu ingat kat family dan rakan taulan kat Malaysia yang sayang kat aku =) Meskipun tidak mempunyai kekasih hati, so what? =) Banyak lagi benda yang buat kita (kau, aku dan semua orang) patut rasa blessed. Kita semua cukup sifat. Kalau tuhan tarik balik mata, confirm hidup kita lagi susah kan? Tapi kita ni, siap ada yang comel² dan kacak² lagi.

Senyum sokmo! (Tak, mak bapak saya orang utara, saya lahir kat Selangor)

Susah Hati

2010-04-23T00:13:00.003+02:00

*membersihkan sawang di blog*

sibuk dengan class. Semester ini, setiap Selasa kena stay back sampai pukul 7.30pm. Tak susah, lab AutoCAD je, seronok, tapi jarang boleh online. Balik, penat, katil pun menggoda
mengejar matahari. Kalau matahari mencocok sikit je keluar dari awan, aku terus sarung kasut dan pakai jaket, ala-ala Anne Hathaway dalam cerita 'The Devil Wears Prada' sebelum Merryl Streep masuk pejabat
pergi menghiburkan hati di Cologne dengan adik-adik di sana. Ye, adik-adik.

Siti rindu UOLS =)

Diari Budak Gemuk Comel I

2010-04-10T11:05:00.003+02:00

Dengan inilah, termaktubnya dalam sejarah, bahawa saya hampir kembali gemuk.

Tadi Christopher cakap, berat dia dah 97kg. Gemuk kan? Tapi dulu berat dia 133kg. Tak aci, kenapa dia dah kurus aku belum???

Maka dengan ini, saya merasmikan diari terbaru saya Diari Budak Gemuk Comel. Eceh, ye, saya mengaku, saya rasa saya comel dan saya tahu saya gemuk. Apa? Saya tak gemuk? Yerla, awak kenal saya, kita cakap pon tengok muka, bukan tengok nombor penimbang berat dalam kilo. Kalau yerla awak tengok, mesti awak takkan ajak saya keluar makan sama-sama dah.

Beberapa hari lalu saya memulakan diet-kurangkan-makan-karbohidrat. Dan agak berjaya jugaklah. Saya makan nasi sekarang maximum dua kali seminggu, dan roti pun jarang-jarang. Tapi dalam masa yang sama saya telah memulakan diet-aku-makan-coklat-setiap-setengah-jam. Amikkaw, tak makan nasi, tapi makan cokelat macam minum air kosong, macam mana nak kurus kan?

Azam saya

balik Malaysia, time mak ambik dari airport perjalanan pulang ke rumah "mak tak kenai dah kakak tadi. Kakak kurus"
mengalahkan kelangsingan dan keayuan Maya Karin (saya baru tengok pisau cukur semalam)
nak pergi shopping kat China. Aku kenal la beberapa awex (dah kahwin) dari Tanah Besar China kat sini. Semua stok beli baju Zara bahagian kanak-kanak sebab tak ada saiz. Aku pulak tak ada saiz bahagian orang dewasa sebab gemuk sangat.
R

Tak nak post gambar muka dah. Nanti aku rasa aku cukup comel pastu terus makan banyak. I love Adibah Noor

Orang Malaysia Kuat Makan

2010-03-31T19:03:00.003+02:00

dengan tajuk itu, aku mengaku aku 110% orang Malaysia. Paling tak boleh blah, yang buat aku teringat. Aku tunjuk gambar zaman sekolah aku kat Encik R, Encik R tengok dan cakap 'Hmmm...'. Time tu aku tak pikir apa-apa lagi. Tapi lepas setahun, dia kata, "oh, orang Malaysia memang tembam-tembam kan," sambil membengkokkan kedua-dua blah tangan, buat mimik budak gemok. Reality check, BAM! ORANG MALAYSIA SEMUA MACAM BUDAK GEMUK.

Kalau tengok kes aku, memang betul lah. Kat jerman macam tak tahan aku tengok banyak all-you-can eat buffet. Setiap tempat ada. Kalaulah ada sebanyak tu kat Malaysia, aku rasa, tak ada siapa boleh berniaga. Orang Malaysia ni perangai buruk sikit kalau bab-bab makan free. Makan sampai nak pecah perut, pastu satu bumbum atas pinggan, agak-agak dah mirip Mount Kinabalu, baru balik meja nak makan. Apa keseronokan kat situ? Makan atau membazir makanan?

Apa yang aku rasa sangat comel, ialah kalau orang Malaysia boleh ada tabiat makan orang french. Kita pon suka makan-makan, diorang pon suka makan-makan, tapi mak-mak french anak tiga lagi fit dari aku. Aku suka tengok kalau diorang makan, first kena masak tu guna fresh ingredients, lepas masak hidang, lepas hidang salin baju untuk makan, dan time makan, semua orang bergembira, pakai cantik-cantik dan makan sedap-sedap. Time tu jugak borak-borak. Bagus kan?

Aku hentam orang, aku ni tak sedar diri. Encik R dan sekeluarga dulu semua makan kurang dari aku. Macam diorang yang ikut sunah nabi, aku yang makan macam babi. OK, niat aku, now kalau aku nak makan aku nak enjoy, boleh?

Cara-cara untuk makan + enjoy:

beli ramuan sehari sebelum
pakai apron sebelum masak
potong bawang dengan kasih sayang
basuh peralatan memasak selepas siap
hidang meja cantik-cantik
mandi / tukar baju
panggil orang tersayang
makan dan sembang :D

Aku Suka Menangis

2010-03-28T20:01:00.004+02:00

percaya tak?

kalau orang yang selalu keluar dengan aku mesti ingat aku ni bajet macho dan yang sewaktu dengannya. Tapi tak, aku selalu menangis kalau aku seorang. Tapi menangis yang control ayu punya type, siap bukak webcam and record untuk tengok comel ke tak aku menangis. Bukan jenis yang menangis berjurai-jurai macam meroyan la, tak vogue gitu.

aku selalu menangis sebab aku happy sekarang. Pelik ke? Aku rasa macam kalau aku menangis aku betul-betul bersyukur kat tuhan sebab bagi semua benda kat aku. Apa yang aku nak, aku dapat. Apa yang aku mimpi-mimpi dari umur aku 9 tahun kecik-kecik dulu, aku dapat. Sekarang aku ada mimpi-mimpi aka impian lain dan aku rasa tuhan Maha Pemberi dan Dia bukan nak aniaya kita.

pastu reason number two, teringat kat ex. Ha, encik R. Walaupun aku tak banyak cerita pasal dia, tapi pembabitan dia dalam hidup aku sangat banyak. Dan walaupun selalu dulu ada sebulan dua kami tak bertegur siapa (darah muda la katakan) negara Lederhosen ni untuk aku, adalah sinonim dengan dia. Tapi kami dah putus. Aku rasa this time around bukan untuk sebulan dua. Aku menangis sebab aku nak tuhan jaga dia. Aku memang sayang dia sebagai hamba Allah, bukan sebab aku lonely, bukan sebab aku nak mat salleh dan lain lain. Aku harap tuhan buka hati dia kenali tuhan yang aku kenal, tuhan yang jaga aku.

untuk yang ketiga sebab aku teringat mak aku. Aku rindu sangat kat dia. Dulu time aku sekolah menengah, sebab aku ni kaki rebel, macam-macam aku bagi sedih kat mak aku. Aku nangis sekarang sebab aku buat dia sedih dulu. Sebab aku toya dan bodoh dan tak fikir pasal keadaan dia yang dianiaya bapak aku. Pastu aku menangis sebab aku rindu dia. Sekarang aku boleh bagitahu dia semua yang dalam hati aku. Aku menangis jugak selalu sebab dia selalu tak ada time untuk aku. Aku taknak selfish tapi aku rindu mak aku.

yang paling aku tak suka kalau aku menangis sebab aku serabut. Cam aku rasa banyak sangat benda aku emo, so aku tak boleh nak buat apa-apa, maka air mata pon suka je mengalir. Eh, counter-productive la. Pastu kalau aku nangis sebab sakit perut pon aku tak suka. Atau nangis sebab tak boleh tidur. Mengada la aku ni. Ok la. Nak jadi produktif sikit.

Kenapa Perempuan Suka Shopping

2010-03-24T14:04:00.003+01:00

Semuanya salah lelaki jugak!

Sebab nak nampak cantik; kalau pakai baju macam mak orang, jawabnya tak kawen sampai menopaus. Kenapa? Salah lelaki la. Men are simple and primitive. Istilah 'under the radar' tak wujud untuk kaum lelaki, sebab perempuan yang lelaki nampak ialah perempuan yang berpakai trendy, haptodet, menjolok mata (walaupun kadang² menyampah jugak, tapi uols perasan kejolokan matanya) dan 'menarik'. Salah siapa kitorang nak nampak cantik? Laki jugak! Kami tak mahu berlakikan kucing 6 ekor bila umur kami 53 tahun nanti, kami nak disayangi!
Taknak orang lain fikir dia kolot; perempuan lain tak kisah kalau perempuan lain tak haptodet dengan fashion sangat. Malah lagi happy, kenapa? Sebab si pemakai lagi trendy! Tapi kalau seorang perempuan kolot, jejaka-jejaka yang melihat si malang ini akan berfikir "eh, awek ni ape cerr. Aku tak nampak awek lain pakai seluar macam ni dah, dia something wrong ke" HA! Salah siapa??? Apa lagi, kitorang pon kenalah check Polyvore, CocoPerez, Vogue atau mendapat mimpi yang bersertakan inspirasi shopping.
Boleh bersama rakan perempuan yang lain; boyfriend ada, tapi jejaka tampan nak pergi main futsal, terpaksa kerja atau tak suka pergi shopping langsung. Habis tu, kami nak buat apa dengan uols? Sebab nak tender, love and care dari someone, pergi la cari geng kaki shopping jugak. Selain dari bergelak ketawa bersama, ini merapatkan lagi silaturrahim, OK! Lagi bagus dari dapat girlfriend yang clingy, kan?
Fave pasttime; oleh kerana saya tidak mahu menyalahkan kaum lelaki dalam situasi saya sendiri, saya mengaku, BEST LA SHOPPING! Boleh pakai lawa-lawa dan senyum sorang-sorang depan cermin (full-body mirror, you!).

Sekian, terima kasih.

Kemerosoton Kualiti Bahasa

2010-03-21T18:09:00.002+01:00

(perghhh... Ilmiah tak topik?)

Setelah chatting, facebooking, blog-hopping, dan kegiatan yang sewaktu dengannya, saya nak buat kesimpulan, dalam 80% muda-mudi MELAYU suka type:

DYE = dia; dye dalam english ialah noun. Benda yang kita guna untuk tukar warna sesuatu -contohnya baju. e.g. tie-dye. Ada paham??? Ni memang pet peeve. Dye perkataan english, dia bahasa malaysia, kalau satu perkataan ni pon kita nak menangkan english, kita kena ajar monyet la lepas ni tulis karangan sebab kita pon tak guna bahasa kita.
TAKPE KEW = takpe ke (ni aku nak menyumpah sebab lidah kau tergeliat macammana sampai KE boleh jadi keWWwwW?!) Dahla perkataan ke tu memang slang, nak kasik lagi slang jadi kew. Ke ada dalam kamus perkataan 'kew' ni
contoh yang tak boleh diBLAHkan; 2H - instead of typing tu, AK - instead of aku, NK - instead of nak. Dahlah guna singkatan sendiri, aku nak faham kena pikir 10minit, time nak baca pon kena lebihkan masa average 10saat untuk satu perkataan tu je. Hangpa susahkan orang la, taip banyak sikit, gerakkan jari, bukan kena beli prepaid lain.

Bukan apa, kita nak tulis, kita nak orang dengar and baca pendapat kita, so kita kena hormat la pembaca kita. Janganla jadi seperti kera, lepas cari kutu sama-sama, makan pisang sorok-sorok.

The Greek Alphabet

2010-03-17T10:04:00.001+01:00

because knowledge is power

2010-03-15T20:16:00.000+01:00

I want to be with You more than five times a day

Sesi Mengutuk Diri Sendiri

2010-03-15T02:07:00.000+01:00

hari tu gua gi Duisburg tahan tak mau pi toilet
sampai Krefeld balik macam nak pecah perut sebab tahan lama sangat

hari ni gua dari Köln
tahan sampai Krefeld
pon macam nak pecah perut jugak

padan muka!

Sesi Mengutuk

2010-03-13T00:45:00.002+01:00

Hari ni gua pergi la Duisburg
Ada pelajar yang berjaya dan akan pulang ke Malaysia
tapi tu bukan apa yang gua nak cerita

Kitorang semua jalan nak naik train
On the way nak gi train stesyen kat Duisburg tu
Gua nampak dua ekor budak
Sekor budak normal,
Sekor lagi seluar lowered nak mampos

Ok gua rasa seluar lowered cam cool
Tapi yang gua rasa tak cool
Seluar budak ni lowered terlebih
Nampak seluar dalam
nampak terus peha budak ni
Gua rasa tak cool dah
Gua tahan gelak
Sebab gua sorang je nampak

She's 75 Years Young!!!

2010-03-12T13:50:00.003+01:00

source

M.A.C Really Isn't Cheap

2010-03-10T14:11:00.006+01:00

satinfinish foundation; 29€

brush; 40€

moisturelush eyecream; 34€

brush cleanser; 13€

now why did I spend this much money again?

I Can't Tie My Shoelaces

2010-03-10T11:30:00.002+01:00

A little dramatisation. I can tie my shoelaces, but it keeps getting untied after 15minutes. Any pointers?

Strike That

2010-03-07T22:34:00.001+01:00

being melancholy isn't my thing
life's too short